So, my youngest son Dakota just woke up screaming. I guess he had a nightmare. Not sure what nightmares a nine month old can have. But, anyway I naturally went to grab him because he was upset and calm him down. My husband came out throwing a fit because he can't sleep and saying I should have just let him cry. Like it's my fault he's been trying to go to sleep for an hour? Dakota was up and crying for maybe ten minutes before he calmed down and fell back asleep. Is it me or can husband throw fits as big or bigger than the kids? LOL!
So, my co-worker and I have been talking about adoption because of some of her friends are going through it. I read a blog where someone had just recently adopted a new baby. They were there in the room when the mother relinquished her rights. That tore out my heart. She made a statement about that being the ultimate act of love for the child. Knowing that you can't take care of it and putting the needs of the baby before your own. I just kept thinking, I don't think I'm that strong. I don't think I could give one of my kids away. Perhaps it's because I'm at a different time in my life and I can provide for my children. I would do anything for them including moving mountains. But, I'm not sure I could give them up. They are my heart and my world. I commend the mothers that know they are incapable of providing for their children and choose adoption. And for the adoptive mothers willing to step in. Both are probably stronger than I. Although I guess it depends on the perspective. I got sober before I had children so that I would be a good mother. Since having my children I've obtained my Bachelors and am currently working on my Masters. I'm not there yet but I continue to attempt to improve myself so that I can be a better mother. If I were extremely young, perhaps that would be different. But, being that I'm in the last few months of my 20s I'm grateful that I grew up enough to become a mother. Without them I wouldn't be who I am and wouldn't have the motivation and clarity that I do. They are my fuel and what keeps me going. I truly believe that if God loves me half as much as I love my kids then He can do anything.
So, today my team and I participated in dress for Halloween at work. I must say that my co-workers far outdid me. We did an 80's theme and they were completely over the top. I'll post pictures when they become available (they were taken with my co-workers camera). So, once she puts them on facebook I can transfer some. But they were absolutely hysterical. Seriously, it was awesome.
But, I digress I suppose it's time for bed. Good night bloggers.
I think adoption would be far harder for the birthmother. Although I guess some people just don't get attached the way others do. I mean, some people leave their babies in bags on the side of the road. At least there are people who are willing to take them in and love them as their own.
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